Writer Amy Weatherly understands the importance of finding inspiration and support in the people around you. So often, we’re forced to compete with and compare ourselves to others. It can be hard to set aside the feelings of jealousy that come along with it and just let yourself love and support the people around you.
Weatherley’s advice on finding one’s “tribe” has been making the rounds on social media and websites like Love What Matters over the last few weeks. It clearly struck a nerve, particularly with women who are seeking out authentic friendships and support.
She begins by pointing out that no matter how successful a woman is, she is likely to have a road littered with failure behind her. After all, the only way to succeed is to step over those failures and continue walking, right?
But so many of us have also been broken down by failures at some point as well. The key is to get back up after you’ve been knocked down because we’ve all come up short at some point in our lives.
Weatherly also addresses the common feeling sometimes known as “imposter syndrome,” the hurtful self-talk that allows us to beat ourselves down by questioning our choices and qualifications and self-worth. But that feeling of not being good enough is common, and if more women knew that they might not be so paralyzed by it when it hits.
She also addresses the outside eyes – the ones we feel are on us at all times, judging our every move and waiting for us to fail. It’s common to assume that others will rejoice in your misfortune, though more often than not, people are simply too worried about their own lives to give it much attention.
But for women with a fire in them, Weatherly says that their dreams, determination, and passion will help them see their goals through to the end. And that’s where other people can help. If we simply let people in, we can let them make us stronger instead of seeing them as those who will criticize, copy, and judge us.
Weatherly is an advocate of the “tribe,” a group of women who fearlessly love one another and can be there to quiet the fears and prop someone up when they’re attempting something difficult. She says:
“Behind every successful woman is a tribe. A tribe of other women who support her and love her and push her to be her absolute best, but stick by her even when she’s at her absolute worst. A tribe of other women who could choose to compete, but take the higher, better road of collaboration instead. A tribe of other women who don’t just fix her crown, but also bend down to pick it up and dust it off when it’s fallen off. A tribe of other women who refuse to get jealous. Who refuse to compare. Who refuse to belittle, or go low. Who refuse to gossip, or leave out, or hurt just to watch her crumble under the pressure.”
But the tribe is not there to simply tell a woman that she’s always right, because that doesn’t help either. Instead, a good tribe will tell the truth, even when it’s hard and uncomfortable, in order to keep a friend from making a mistake she might regret. But should she choose to make that mistake, they are there to help pick her up and dust her off.
Weatherley’s advice has touched women all over the world, even those who don’t necessarily consider themselves to have a “tribe,” but rather depend on their faith to carry them through.
“Behind every successful woman is a God who knows the plans He has had for her from the very beginning. A God who holds her in His own hand and cheers her on from Heaven.”
In closing, she raises a metaphorical toast to all the things in a woman’s life that allow her to be who she is at her best and encourage her to be good to both herself and others going forward:
“Here’s to the past that made you who you are.
Here’s to the list of failures that taught you to do it better.
Here’s to the voices you learned to quiet.
Here’s to the eyes you learned to shrug off.
Here’s to the woman you used to be. She brought you to the this very place.
Here’s to the fire that won’t let you quit.
Here’s to the tribe who builds you up in big and small ways every single day.
Here’s to the God who tells the stars where to shine and still loves you even more.
Here’s to you, successful woman. Keep burning bright. The world needs who you are, what you have, and what you’re doing to make this place a little lighter.”
Of course, hundreds of women have been able to relate to or have been inspired by Weatherley’s words and showed their support on her original Facebook post.
But others have shared their struggles with finding their tribe. We can’t take for granted that women are often pitted against each other as mothers, in the workplace, etc. and we’re not all lucky enough to find a group of like-minded women to support us.
Still others have said they found their tribe within their own families.
At the end of the day, support comes in all different forms, and it’s all for the good if you can find people to support you whether they’re your girlfriends, co-workers, siblings, family, or anyone else you see fit to invite into your life.
You can see Weatherley’s original post below.
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Source: Love What Matters