Once a simple Canadian coffee and donut shop and now a global chain, Tim Hortons (or Timmy Hos to those in the know) is still a favorite among carb-lovers. (And yes, the lack of an apostrophe is intentional.)
Whether you’re a fan of their famous honey crullers and apple fritters or go in for their newer, more savory creations, you’ve no doubt wanted to head back ASAP.
But before you do, you should know that there’s a whole hashtag devoted to #timhortonsproblems, so it’s clear there’s some customer behavior in need of fixing.
Let’s face it, most of these behaviors won’t fly at any restaurant.
But next time you go for your Timbits or “double double” fix, remember not to do any of the following things.
1. Make employees recite the menu
There’s a menu right above the register and the donuts are all available for you to see, so there’s no reason to ask the person working the register to tell you every flavor of donut the store sells.
Get your act together and keep your eyes open so you can help yourself and not hold up the line.
2. Treat the bathroom as your own
Get in, get out. We know there are emergencies that take a little longer, but if you’re using a public restroom you need to consider other people as well as the ones who clean it.
We don’t want to know what you’re doing in there for minutes at a time, but we hope you’ve tidied up after yourself before you get that knock on the door.
3. Act like you’re at another restaurant
You can’t get a venti iced mocha or a McAnything at Tim Hortons.
It’s not hard to remember which restaurant you’ve stumbled into, so don’t expect employees to know what you mean when you order a dish they don’t serve.
4. Don’t be a jerk
This should go without saying, but people who work in the service industry should be treated with the same respect you’d expect from them.
Have a two-way conversation with them, let them finish their sentences, and treat them like the human beings they are while they do their jobs.
5. Fail to listen to the question
Just because you say it louder doesn’t mean anyone understood your non-sensical answer to their question.
Listen to people when they’re trying to serve you or else expect to end up with the wrong item.
6. Expect magical things to appear
Ok, so it doesn’t necessarily hurt to ask, but if you’ve spent time taking up precious real estate in front of the donut display and they don’t have what you want when you ask, you really need a back-up plan.
There’s a reason they call it fast food.
7. Treat cashiers like they’re lepers
Maybe you didn’t see someone reach out their hand. But if you find yourself in this situation, the least you can do is apologize.
Or better yet, pick up your money and put it in the hand that’s feeding you.
8. Take your private business into a public place
Well now we know why they need the sign in #2.
We get that people might need some privacy, but at the very least you can carry your very personal trash out with you.
9. Decide to give more change after you hand over a bill
We’re not questioning anyone’s ability to do math here, we’re just saying that you need to make up your mind about how you want to pay the first time you hand over your cash.
Don’t decide to get rid of some change when you’ve already sealed the deal. It’s just annoying.
10. Complain about personal problems you caused yourself
Why are you blaming someone else for your bad digestive decisions?
And why bother drinking coffee if what you really want is some sort of milkshake?
11. Fail to understand how temperature works and expect someone else to fix it
Cold liquid cools off a hot drink. It’s not an employee’s fault that you added so much milk to your coffee that it’s no longer hot.
You learned the Second Law of Thermodynamics in high school. Time to use it.
12. Expect a “fresh pot”
If there are other people in the restaurant, the coffee has likely been flowing non-stop.
Asking for a fresh pot at that point just makes you look entitled.
But we do get the need to ask if the place is deserted and you’re wondering how long that pot has been on. Then again, we also understand why this would annoy the workers.
13. Fail to understand the simple concept of a drive-thru
How hard is it to understand the drive-thru? If you find it hard to hear through the speaker, you always have the option of going in and speaking to someone face to face.
Unless you have a legitimate disability AND a reason not to go into the store, it’s rude and disruptive to the workflow to simply skip the speaker step of your drive-thru order.
14. Expect recommendations from strangers
This is not a question you ask while there are people in line behind you. Or ever, really.
While some people are happy to share their recommendations, you really need to have a game plan for when you go in and not hang all of your happiness on whether the workers have a good recommendation for you.
No one is there to make friends.
15. Ask if the donuts are fresh
If you’ve ever seen a commercial for Tim Hortons you know they’re proud of making small batches throughout the day to ensure the donuts are always fresh.
Besides, what do you expect them to tell you? That they’re all stale and gross?
16. Go all French when you order a croissant
You’re the only one who thinks it’s cute to try to pronounce croissant with your lamest French accent.
You can order however you want, but just don’t expect anything other than a barely concealed eye roll instead of a compliment on your French.
17. Disregard cleanliness
We appreciate your desire to save one more cup from the landfill, but no one wants to touch the gross mug you keep in your car and fail to wash out.
Maybe you think hot coffee will kill anything growing in it, but we can assure you that’s just gross.
On the other hand, there’s a special place in hell for people who expect an employee to clean out their mug for them. That’s not gonna fly either.
18. Forget your manners
Expect some choice comments about your parents behind your back if they didn’t teach you to say please and thank you.
You’re talking to a human here, so act like it.
19. Have unrealistic expectations
Sure, fast food is supposed to be fast. But when everyone has the same idea, that’s really not the employee’s fault.
If you are really in such a hurry, you might have to skip your donut if you go in with 20 seconds of extra time and find 15 people in line.
20. Be this person
Who does this?
We all change our minds, but sometimes it’s better to just live with the consequences of your actions so you remember to have your act together next time.
Don’t inconvenience everyone around you just because you can’t make up your mind.
21. Try bad comedy
Every joke you think is funny has been heard a thousand times already. Credit card not working? Don’t say “I guess it’s free then.”
Just be polite, smile, order, and let everyone get on with their lives.
22. Ask for a half anything
Just ask for the packet and do your own work.
What’s an employee supposed to do with half a sweetener packet? That’s trash for your own car.
23. Ask for special orders
Fast food is fast because it’s uniform. While Tim Hortons was bought by Burger King (the kings of “having it your way”) in 2014, the option to customize didn’t spread.
No one is going to go back in the kitchen and get you a special donut.
24. Be clueless
Wait, did you expect them to hand a china cup of coffee out the window to you?
Have you been through a drive-thru before?
25. Police the behavior of employees
Unless someone is doing something dangerous or unsanitary, you should be happy that people have found a way to have a good time at work.
If you don’t like employees joking around with each other, the problem is with you.
And there are plenty of other places you can go get something to eat.
26. Not understand the concept of a double-double
A double is a coffee with two creams and two sugars.
You can’t have it black.
You can’t have it any other way, otherwise, just order a coffee with however many cream and sugar packets you want.
It’s not rocket science.
27. Hit on employees
Just never do this anywhere.
No one wants to be hit on at work. They want to do their jobs and go home.
Hold your tongue and your comments about your feelings or opinions on how attractive someone is while they’re trying to do their jobs.
28. Assume things in life are free
If there was free coffee, you’d know about it.
Asking for something for nothing isn’t going to get you anything but an “accidental” decaf as punishment for being annoying.
29. Basically order catering at the drive-thru
Do you really need to hold up the line while the person at the window watches you find space for all that food in your car?
We get it – sometimes you have a big order. But that’s when you go into the store or even call ahead so people can prepare to drain two pots of coffee in 2 minutes.
30. Blame employees for company policy
No one likes it when prices go up. But the cashier can’t really help you with that problem.
Register a complaint online like a productive adult and don’t make anyone’s shift more unpleasant than it already is by complaining about something they can’t control.
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